Switch February 3, 2010

Truth: Eating less than 1250 calories a day is NOT working for me. Yes, doing so will help me lose 2lbs a week. No, I don’t need to work THAT hard right now. I will surely burn out if I keep this up. I’ve been very consumed with what I’m eating and how many calories I’m burning at the gym. To be sure, this stuff is important. However, it’s taking up too much of my time. I’m going through something personally, spiritually, emotionally, mentally and am not dealing with it at all. Instead, I have focused all of my energy into losing weight. I need balance. I’ve been trying my best to burn between 400 and 500 calories via exercise 5 days a week. I’m exhausted. I knew this wasn’t going to be easy. I also know myself. I’m not strong enough yet to tackle a 2lb loss each week. For now, I’ll drop my goal down to 1.5 pounds each week. The difference is 250 more calories. I need those calories. I will continue to exercise and make better choices, but I’m hoping that allowing myself a little more wiggle room will make this easier to maintain in the long run. I don’t like feeling deprived and that’s exactly what I’ve felt for the last few days.

 

If you’ve been following Random Thoughts for a while or read through the archives, you’ll know that I was anorexic from about 7th to 9th grade. Once I got past the initial hunger pains, it was nothing for me to starve myself for days. I don’t ever want to go back down that road again. Being restricted to so few calories on days (as in 2) that I didn’t work out, or didn’t burn at least 400 calories in the gym, has made me fear food and slightly obsessed with calories burned. The binging that I’ve done recently is a result of me depriving myself. Tazzee, as soon as I read your comment saying this about yourself, it clicked for me. Losing weight won’t be impossible for me. It is still within my reach. At this point, I need to switch the game up a bit so that I can still be successful. I’ll try this for a week or 2 and see how it goes. If it doesn’t work, then I’ll begrudgingly go back to the 1200 range for a while.

 

I promise you I’m not giving up. I’m not making excuses. I’m switching strategies and trying to work within my limits. This, I believe, is the best way to be successful on a long-term basis. Stay with me, folks. I’ll still be trekking along. It may take me a few more weeks to get there, but it WILL happen. Again, I WILL NOT LOSE!!!

I Get So Weak February 1, 2010

… In the knees I can hardly speak. I lose all control when *ahem* cravings take oooooover me.

 

Excuse me while I have a moment to mourn my self-control. For almost 24 hours, I have had the insatiable urge to stuff my face and laze around the house. Chocolate is numero uno on the list, followed closely by salty/cheesy, then all out sweetness of fruity goodness. My biggest mistake was having these cravings and going grocery shopping. I had a list. A very short list. So why in sam hayle did I deviate from said list and fill my cart with two boxes of Weight Watchers ice cream bars (Not so bad, as they were on sale 2 for $7 – though I didn’t really NEED to buy 2 boxes, did I? Hush!), THREE boxes of 100 calorie pack snacks (Did you know that Peppridge Farm makes 100cal pk Milano and Chessman cookies? They were on sale too), and a box of fruit snacks? It used to be that I could have just 1 of these things and I would be satisfied. So, tell me why I found myself scarfing down 2 packs of fruit snacks = 160 calories of pure sugar last night. Then, because I just love sabotaging all of my efforts, I inhaled a pack of Milanos and some Sun Chips about an hour ago. I’m greedy. I also skipped my workout this afternoon (No worries, I will do something because the guilt is killing me). I just wrote a post about choices and here I go making dumb ones. I hate wasting money, but I truly despise being this damn big and unhealthy. Obviously, I’m not strong enough to have snacks in my house just yet. I’ll give them away (not the ice cream – I need the ice cream) as soon as I’m done tasting the Chessman cookies. Doh! I also have Girl Scout cookies on the way. HELP!!!

 

I need better choices. The feeling I got after eating the snacks was a fleeting moment of satisfaction that was quickly replaced with guilt and shame. I knew it wasn’t the best choice, so why did I do it? How can I prepare myself to handle these things better? Part of the problem is that I don’t know when I’ve had enough. Seriously. Unless my stomach is Thanksgiving dinner full, I’m usually not satisfied. What has been keeping me back so far was counting my calories and thinking about how much exercise I’d have to do to burn off the snacks. It didn’t seem worth it to me before. Now? Not so much. Once I decided to eat the things, consequences be damned, and then decided to skip the workout, it was all downhill. I need filling alternatives for snacks. Better yet, I would like your help thinking of more filling main meals. Perhaps if I packed more filling (low calorie & protein and fiber packed) meals, I wouldn’t be so tempted to snack as heavily. Any and all suggestions are welcome. The sabotage ends today.

 

Next time we’ll discuss my issues with deprivation. In the meantime, please send your tips and meal plans.

Choices January 31, 2010

It’s Sunday and it’s time to report my weight and reflect on the week. I’m down 2 pounds! I’ve been using the LoseIt application to help me track my food intake and exercise. According to their calculations, eating 1,237 calories a day will help me attain a 2lb loss each week. Please note that I eat more than 1237 because I still have fat girl tendencies. So, to compensate for that, I also make sure I burn off anything over that magical number to stave off weight gain. For example, on Tuesday, I ate 1,468 calories worth of food and burned off 381 calories in the gym. 1468 – 381 = 1087. Meaning, I was 150 calories UNDER for the day. This is where choices come into play.

 

Once I was done with Tuesday’s workout, I very well could have picked up something worth 150 calories and munched til my heart’s desire. Instead, I banked those saved calories (and some additional ones from Wednesday) for later in the week. I knew that I was going out for a friend’s birthday on Thursday and wanted to enjoy a drink and some cake. I was, technically, 145 calories over on that day, but I enjoyed every single bit of food that passed my lips? Why? Well, duh! Because I love food. But, more importantly, I worked hard earlier in the week to earn that meal. It is possible to have one drink, a slice of cake, and french fries when you’re out with your girls. Admittedly, had I not had a hamburger bun with my scrambled eggs during breakfast and the dinner roll that came with my dinner salad, I would have been under budget that day. No problem. Carbs are big calorie suckers for me. Now I know better, so I will do better.

 

Other choices that I’ve made this week were surprising to me. I’ve been giving myself a few pats on the back each day. I had to run an experiment on Wednesday at 3:30pm. This means I wasn’t able to leave until about 4:30. I wanted to try a spinning class at 5:30 that was on a first come first serve basis, but my workout clothes were 15 minutes away in my house. Hmmm. What to do? I high-tailed it out of the lab and went home to change. When I got to the gym that night at 5:00, the lot was full. I get disgusted when looking for parking spots on campus because I pay for a premium parking pass and I hate undergrads who swarm the lot the second they can put their little cars in my premium spot after 5pm. LOATHE! Anyway, after circling for a few minutes and feeling extremely frustrated, I took a deep breath and resigned to parking out by the fields. On a nice day, this wouldn’t have bothered me, but I’m not a fan of a 3 minute walk through snow and black ice with crazy undergrads swerving through the very dark parking lot. I made it to the class and enjoyed a great workout anyway. I wrote all of that to say that the old me would have given up at 4:30. The new me? Well… Ya girl is pushing through the challenges and excuses. I’m also going to keep a pair of workout clothes in my car.

 

What have you done differently this week? Any updates from Team Shrink?

Random Passive Aggressive Notes January 28, 2010

There comes a time when people just piss me the hell off. Sadly, notorious for misdirecting my anger onto others. I’ve found that the best thing for me to do is write down my frustrations, breathe, acknowledge that whoever it is isn’t worth my blood pressure rising, and now – work out my frustrations via exercise. I’m still on step 1:

 

Dear Student Community Service Organization,

 

I go through enough hoops for graduate school, so I don’t appreciate having to go through more outside of that. I especially don’t appreciate it when it’s for something I was doing before you and your so-called organization came along. This small ordeal just left a very bad taste in my mouth for your organization (what do you do again?) and this entire event. So, instead of spending my ducats on charity ball tickets and all the accouterments associated with being glammed up for said ball (i.e., pedicure, manicure, new shoes, etc.), I will be spending both my time and financial resources elsewhere (i.e., the spa).

 

Dear Airlines,
Thank you for increasing ticket prices for Super Bowl Weekend – forcing me to stay in drab and freezing Cornfields, USA. Even though I’m not going any where near Miami, you can kick rocks for making those tickets so damn high. You can also kick rocks for suggesting that I layover in Milwaukee for what should be a nonstop flight. Really? Wisconsin? Why are you routing me NORTH when I’m not even going that way? So, what should be a 1hr 40min flight has now morphed into a 6 hr journey? And did you really think it was the best idea to lay someone over to Wisconsin in the dead of winter? Nah, son. I’m not going out like that.

 

Dear Undergraduate Research Assistants,
Why in thee hell are you so fucking slow? This is the 3rd week in the research lab. There are handbooks with all the answers to your questions. You do not need me to hold your hand the entire time. Your incompetence is particularly irritating because it’s fucking with my pending graduation. Get it together!

 

Dear Notsonewanymore Graduate Student,
What is your purpose in life? Seriously! You’ve been in the lab for 5 months. Why the hell don’t you know how to do anything? You’re worse than the damn undergrads. Asking me fiddyleven questions when I walk in the door on my OFF day is not what’s hot in the streets. Did you see my face and read the I don’t give a fuck expression emanating from it? Figure that shit out on your own! You should know how to print a damn letter. If you don’t, look it up in the manual. You should also know how to run your own damn study. If you don’t, sounds like you’ll be here for a while because I can’t help you with that one. Lastly, you should also know that I think you’re completely incapable of being of any use to me in the short time I have left here in this lab. As such, just do your best to keep quiet and stay out of the way.

 

Dear Person Who Called Me at 6am,
You had the wrong number! And why the hell are you calling someone so damn early anyway? Please go back to your Mama and ask her to give you some more home training. If that isn’t possible, please see mine. She’ll school you.

 

Wow! That felt great! I’m off to the gym then preparing for a night out with friends. Today’s goal is to burn at least 300 calories so that I can enjoy a couple of drinks and cake.

Womp womp January 27, 2010

Just got back home from sampling a spinning class at my campus gym. Wow! Didn’t think I had a big ass until I had to get on that tiny seat. Great workout! I’ll admit that I didn’t push myself too, too hard. It was enough for my legs to be burning and sweat to pour profusely from my body, but not enough where I couldn’t breathe and had to grab the inhaler (yea the one I STILL can’t seem to find). Anyway, I loved the class, music and instructor so much that I went to sign up for the semester as soon as we were done. Unfortunately, they were all booked. Every. Single. Class. Did I mention there are 4 different spinning classes? But I think they only have 18 bikes. Oh, well. Guess the early birds got all the bikes. I’ll put that $77 to good use for my fitness goals. Maybe I’ll be getting the EA Sports game or other gadgets for the Wii. Not sure yet.

In other news… Me running at 6:15am is NOT happening. I see no reason to lie to myself and commit to something that absurd. I don’t need to be up that early. I’m thinking 7 or 8am is a great time for Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays. I’ll have to work in something else on Tuesdays & Thursdays in the evening. Think this is where those group finess/strength training classes will come into play. I’m not giving up on me. I am, however, trying to make this fit into my lifestyle because I want to keep this up for the rest of my life. If you’re not a morning person and have no need to be up at the ass crack of dawn, going to workout that early won’t last very long. Maybe that’s just me, but I’d rather have more sleep and be excited about working outthan dreading it because of the ungodly hour I’d have to get up to do it.

That was a lot to write onthis touch screen, so I’ll end it here. Keep me posted on your fitness journey and help keep me accountable.

Holy Crap! January 27, 2010

Let’s talk about this Senna tea that @mrsfitlegalegl suggested for a detox. It’s an herbal laxative tea. I took it last night before bed, as the box said it takes 6 – 8 hours to start working. The taste was smooth wihout sugar and soothed me to sleep. I awoke the next morning to an unannounced visitor at my door (this warrants another post). Mr couldn’t have picked a worse time. About 35 minutes into his visit and my stomach did the tell-tale signals. Gurgle. Rumble. Grrrrr. Bloop bloop. <– dunno bout y'all but that's usually my cue to make it to the bathroom in the next 30 seconds OR ELSE.

And, because I'm neurotic and thought this would make for good blog/Twitter fodder, I weighed myself before and after. I lost THREE pounds. That's just nuts! I'm a regular gal, so I figured a laxative wouldn't do much more for me than was already being done. Wrong! Every time I thought I was done I'd have to go right back. I kid you not, I would wash my hands and the gurgling would start again before I could reach the bathroom door. Also, keep in mind that this was all going on while I had company – in my very small and not soundproof one bedroom apartment. Man! @mrsfitlegalegl warned me that it would clean me out. And that it did. I'll try again nex week and see how I feel.

I will not lose January 27, 2010

Excuse me while I channel some Jay-Z…

 

The title of this one is two-fold. I refuse to give up on myself! Unfortunately, that bastard scale is telling me that I, literally, will not lose a damn pound. Dubya Tee Eff! Ok, that’s a bit of an exaggeration, but here’s the deal… I keep losing and gaining the same 3-5 pounds. It’s annoying! I’m absolutely fed up! The new game plan includes logging all of my food in the LoseIt App (iPod Touch & iPhone). I may or may not also do this online. Having it on the iPod is convenient, so I’ll try this for now. Logging my food will keep me honest and more aware of what I’m shoveling in my mouth. I know I should have been doing this all along, but that’s in the past and we’re moving forward now. LoseIt also keeps track of my calories burned via exercise. Tres convenient! Check this space again in a week to see how I’m doing.

 

Oh, and I will not get on the scale every single day like I used to do. Let’s see if I can make it until Sunday. I’m trying the free cycling class tomorrow and may be signing up for the 11 week class if I like it. *fingers crossed* I will also be signing up for a group fitness pass so I can do aerobics and sculpting. I don’t see myself continuing to go to the gym on my own and lifting weights. It’s dull and I need some spice in my life. Other than that, I’ll be Wii Fit’ing and training for my 3rd half marathon. Once I get a solid routine down, I’ll report more regularly.

 

What’s going on in your fitness world, blog peeps?

Changing & Small Victories January 20, 2010

*cue J-Hud* I am chaaaaaanging! Seriously, I’m turning over new leaves each day. I shared this with my Tweeps already, but it’s worth saying here again.

 

Tuesday I was supposed to sample a cycling class at the campus gym. Unfortunately, my plans were foiled by an unannounced visit from Mr. Ex. Dude showed up, disturbed my peace, made me miss my 5:30 class, and left enough negative energy to make me want to tuck into a big tub of ice cream. Instead of doing the latter, I decided to pick myself up and head over to the gym anyway. I was too late for the cycling class, but I went to an aerobics class about 35 minutes later. It was called “Get on the Ball” and is the reason why my arms and abs are currently killing me. About 50 minutes on an exercise ball that wasn’t quite big enough to be supporting all of my weight as I did a bunch of core, arms, and leg exercises. Wowza! What a great workout.

 

Today I was supposed to meet a fellow sistagirl runner at 6:15 am. Does anybody else see something wrong here? Yea, that’s too damn early for my tastes, but I got dressed and went over to the track anyway. Unfortunately, when I got there, I didn’t see her among the hoards of military folks there doing PT. It was a bit intimidating. Little (well. big and round, but short) ol’ me and alllll of them. Given my intimidation and particular lack of patience that early in the morning, I left after waiting 15 minutes. I really wanted to go home and climb back in my bed. Instead, I detoured to my apartment complex’s gym and did a 5k on the treadmill. I walked the first 5 minutes, then jogged the next 39 minutes. That’s the slowest I’ve ever run a 5K. I wonder if adding an incline helped to slow me down? It ranged from 0 to 3.5. *shrug* It’s OK, though. I can only get better. I’ll also try to meet sistagirl again next week. These half marathons will be here before I know it.

 

I’m appreciating the small victories in my life. Have you any small victories lately? Sharing is caring. Head to the comment section, if you’d like.

 

Don’t give up on you!

Broken January 19, 2010

I love that man. I shouldn’t, but I do. We shouldn’t have even been together. It was wrong. I’ve known this from the very beginning. But here’s the thing about your heart, it’s stubborn and doesn’t give a damn what your head tells it to do. Like I said, I love that man. The problem, my friends, is that I cannot and will not continue to be miserable and stifle who I am because I’m scared it will make him uncomfortable. This is me. A hot ass mess. I’m loud, crude, obnoxious, but I’m loyal and I love HOARD! I love that man. But I love this woman more. This past week has been very rough for me. I’ve been struggling with how to be there for him (his family was in a bad accident back home) without lapsing back into that familiar place we were in previously. I am hurt, angry, disappointed, but most of all, slightly relieved that I no longer have to worry about pleasing someone else. For the first time in months I feel like I can finally breathe. Albeit, they are very shallow breaths, but they are breaths all the same. And even though I’m relieved, something still doesn’t feel right. A part of me is missing. I cannot deny that I miss him. Maybe it will get better with time. Maybe the tears will stop flowing soon. In the meantime, I have to focus on something else. School and dropping a kindergartner in weight are big priorities right now.

Random Tuesday Thoughts January 12, 2010

Today was a long day for me. I had another late start to work – got there around 9:40 instead of 9:00. I will get there on time on Thursday! Wednesdays are when I come in the afternoons, so I’ll aim to get there tomorrow around 10. The joys of being a senior grad student during training week. The downside to being me is that I’m beginning to feel like I’m the only one who knows how to do things around the lab. I really need the undergrads to be on point this semester because I’ll need their help to get my dissertation project up and running. This will be a productive semester for me. Watch!

 

I ate dinner early, enjoyed a cup of hot coocoa, then sulked on my couch until I fell asleep watching Grey’s Anatomy reruns. Normally, I would wake back up, eat again, play on the internet, and then go back to sleep. This time is different. This time, I got back up, finished a few more residual tasks from today’s work day, put in 40 minutes on Wii Fit, then had a snack of low fat vanilla yogurt and a banana before playing on the internet. Small changes. Instead of continuously sulking, I did something about the problem, and took out whatever frustrations I had left on my workout routine. And you know what? I feel pretty darn good.

 

I’ve been wearing my hair a little different lately and I think I like it. Each night I’ve been putting my hair in chunky flat twists and unraveling them in the morning for crinkly locs. Not sure if this is stretching my hair, but I noticed today that it looks a bit longer than usual. Nice! Remember that the purpose of me starting these locs was to 1) never have to worry about detangling again and 2) to see how long I could grow my hair. I’d like to perfect the routine some more before I post pictures. Stay tuned.

 

Lastly, I have been going on and on today worried about myself and was unaware of the earthquake that hit Haiti. While I was being a whiny brat, people were losing lives and loved ones. It was the reality check I needed. A reminder that HE is so much greater than me. My heartfelt prayers go out to the victims.

Wiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii January 11, 2010

If you’ve been following me on Twitter, you’d know that I recently purchased the Wii Fit Plus bundle. I played the game at a friend’s house last week and loved it. I then went dress shopping this weekend and felt like a beached whale. It was a very low point for me, but I decided that I needed to do something about it. I could buy a new dress in a bigger size or I could pull something out of my closet to wear to an upcoming charity ball and spend the money on reaching my fitness goals. So, off to the Red Circle Boutique I went to pick up my new gadget – it was on sale. Here’s what I’m thinking… It cost me $99 (plus $7 in tax, but I won’t count that) to get this Wii Fit Plus and I’m determined to get my money’s worth. My goal is to use this thing as much as possible over the next 99 days, so I won’t feel like I wasted any mula. I’ll also get in some decent workouts while easing my financial guilt, so really, this is a win-win situation all around. My favorite game by far is Super Hoola Hoop. I’m getting really good at it, as evidenced by me unlocking 10 minutes of the game. Do you know how much work it is to swing virtual hoola hoops for 10 minutes? Between this and walking (I’ve decided to ease up on running due to the funny feeling I’ve been getting in my right knee when I last ran), I should be able to knock off some pounds by the end of the month. Come February, I hope to add another element of fitness – spinning/cycling. I’ve got goals to reach, folks. Catch ya next time.

Confessions January 11, 2010

Forgive me, Blogville, for I have sinned. I went to the golden arches tonight and pigged out – AFTER I had already inhaled couscous and goat & veggie stew. How am I supposed to lose weight if I sneak out to get large fries and a cheeseburger after dinner? I finished the burger, but the salt from the fries were burning my chapped lips. To add insult to literal injury, a few fries in and they started to taste like… urine. Not that I know what urine tastes like, but I’m sure it would taste like whatever grease those fries were done in – maybe. Mooooving on. I eat when I’m stressed. I eat when I’m not prepared. So, how do I control this? Do I distract myself with other activities? Guess this is where the working out part fits in, huh? Slowly, slowly. I really need to figure this out – and soon. I’ve admitted and identified the problem, now is the time to find a solution. Do you have any suggestions to help me reduce stress, resist cravings, or to help keep me from overindulging? Please share.

Snap, crackle, pop January 7, 2010

Written on 1/4/09:

This woman on the plane behind me has the most obnoxious habit of chewing and popping her gum extremely loud. Grrr! All I want to do is sit here and read my book without hearing her pop, snap, crackle, pop every 2.5 seconds. Then, to add insult to injury, she has the nerve to sit here and read scripture to her husband? loudly. So, of course, now I can’t be upset because she’s a God fearing Christian woman. But good lawd I just want her to stop with all the popping. This shit is driving me nuts. The only relief I get is when she talks – more like yells at her husband over the roar of the engine.

Oooh! The flight attendant just handed us some biscotti. Maybe that will keep her occupied. Maybe she’ll spit out her gum. No, with my luck she’s likely someone like me that keeps the gum to one side of their mouth while eating something so they can resume chewing when they’re done. God help me please. Forget Chinese water torture. All you’d have to do is lock someone in a small crowded room with her and an endless supply of chewing gum. They’d likely reveal their terrorist plots and/or renounce their horrible ways quickly. Ugh! How is she managing to chew the cookie AND pop her gum at the same time? This is ridiculous. 5pm can’t get here fast enough – that’s when I land if you haven’t figured it out. Snap. Pop. Chomp. Crackle. Pop. All the way from the Empire State to the damn cornfields. Maybe one of us will fall asleep soon. Pray for me, y’all.

And it hurts like brand new shoes January 6, 2010

Please allow me my first brain dump of the new year.

After all that I have done for him, it has finally come to this. What I can only hope for is the end of us and the beginning of something new. Something better has to come for me. I have faith that I will be better. I have to distract myself from the hurt that I’m feeling. Betrayal is never easy to swallow. Money, sex, and love, apparently, do not maintain loyalty. I can’t believe I put up with this as long as I did. I’m still unsure if I’ve had enough, honestly. What I am sure of is that nothing will ever be the same ever again. I can’t take back what happened last month, yesterday, or even an hour ago. And, sadly, neither can he. I’m not one to easily forgive and I’m definitely not one to ever forget. I file things in my memory and access the folders of others’ transgressions as needed. I thought there was so much potential there, but I think I was wrong. The two of us cannot coexist. One must die out before the other can truly live. I have become someone that I barely recognize – accepting things that I said I would never accept. I’ve grown so far from where I thought I was supposed to be. Excuse me while I mourn the me that used to be, that never got a chance to become, and will probably never be again. Maybe when the sun rises things will feel differently. Here, in the dark, there is nothing but bitterness, anger, disappointment, and hurt. There is a woman in Indiana. And she hurts like brand new shoes…

Gooooooaaaaaaaaal December 31, 2009

Last year I had a cute little saying to ring in the new year. Victory, Love, and Happiness: Mine in ‘09. While I will probably always struggle to maintain my happiness (who doesn’t?), I did a pretty good job on getting the other 2. I passed my prelims and became a doctoral candidate. I struggled in the love department, but I’m counting that as a win. Being in so many bad relationships and situationships helps you to identify what you need to stay away from. It also helps you to appreciate a good man when you find him.

 

My Twitter Divas have inspired me to sit down and focus on my goals for the upcoming year. I’m supposed to make a vision board as well, but that’s not happening tonight. I’ll get it done before classes start. In the meantime, here’s a very short list of things I’d like to I will accomplish in 2010.

 

1. Seriously commit to living a healthier, more active lifestyle.

 

I enjoy running – even if I am slow. What I don’t enjoy is motivating myself to go running. I’ve got 2 half marathons lined up for May. I’m also an emotional overeater. How else can I explain gaining 13 pounds in 7 weeks? And, NO! I AM NOT PREGNANT! <–general disclaimer…. I eat when I'm upset, hurt, angry, happy, bored, etc. My goal for 2010 and on is to commit to burning calories on a regular basis through some sort of physical activity (running, dancing, walking, aerobics class, weights, vigorous love sessions, etc). I will also try my hardest to shed 40 – 50 pounds once and for all. Watch me. Help keep me accountable.

 

2. Get the hell out of grad school.

 

I’m tired of being broke, stressed, and depressed. There’s no reason for me to spend any more of my life doing something that I absolutely hate. I will try my hardest to get hooded by December of 2010.

 

3. Learn French.

 

I don’t know where this thing with Mr. will take me, but learning French will make me more marketable and well-rounded. Not sure if I want to take a class or do something on my own. I’ll figure it out.

 

4. Learn how to say NO.

 

How many times have I found myself in a situation resenting being there and feeling downright miserable? Too many! Had I said no, much of that angst could have been avoided.

 

I’ll continue adding to this list because it feels a bit short. Then again, maybe that’s the key to being successful – taking it one step at a time. My next move is to sit down and focus on a plan of attack. It’s not just enough for me to say I want something to happen. I need to figure out what I’m going to do to make it happen. Watch this space, folks. And, please help keep me on track. Tweeting or emailing me to ask why I haven’t posted anything or to ask about updates is perfectly acceptable.