Triple Whip

Triple Whip:
1T Cocoa Butter
1/2T Shea Butter
1/2T Mango Butter
1T Olive Oil
1T Extra Virgin Coconut Oil
1T Castor Oil
1T Vegetable Glycerine

Yields: a little more than 8oz

- Combine butters and oils, then melt on low via double boiler.

- Remove from heat and add glycerine.

- Whip with electric mixer for 2 minutes.

- Place blend in ice bath then set in freezer for 13 minutes.

- Remove chilled blend from freezer and whip for 5 minutes while in ice bath. Product should be white and fluffy. If you’d like to add any essential oils, add them now, then whip for another 2 minutes (optional).

-Pour product into container of choice.

*You may stop here if you like the consistency or continue as I did.

- Let product rest for 1 minute on ice bath then whip for another 6 minutes.

- Place product in container of choice then whip for another 3-5 minutes.

**Recipe modified from http://tinyurl.com/6mvdhlm

Thoughts: I absolutely LOVE the consistency. It’s so fluffy and light. It also melts to the touch. I’ll keep an eye out on this product because I have 2 concerns. 1) Will it keep its consistency over time?  I’ve seen my own and other YouTubers’ whipped butters re-harden after a few days. 2) Will it keep my skin moisturized? My ash has been something serious since moving back to NYC. Using shea butter and coconut oil on damp skin immediately after the shower yields brilliant results initially. A few hours later, however, I’m back to being ashy. As I’m writing this post it has been 6 hours since I showered and applied the Triple Whip. So far, the ash is still gone. I’d be happy with another 4 hours of coverage, but I think that might be pushing it. We’ll see…

Flax Seed & Marshmallow Root Gel

Flaxseed & Marshmallow Root Gel:
2 Cups Water
1t Marshmallow Root
1/4 Cup Whole Flax Seeds (raw NOT roasted/toasted)

Yields about 10 – 12 oz

Bring water to a boil. Pour over marshmallow root as you would for tea. Cover container and let steep for 6 hours or overnight.

Pour water into a pot then add flax seeds. Bring to a gentle boil on stovetop (about 5-7 minutes).

Strain liquid into container of choice. Product will thicken while resting.

*Recipe modified from @Naptural85.

Thoughts: I’ve made this gel once before. The process I previously used involved straining the ridiculously thick gel through an old stocking. What a mess! This time I didn’t let the mixture get too thick while boiling and only strained the liquid through a mesh strainer. This meant that I didn’t get every last drop of gel out, but my cleanup was a cinch. I think that’s an even trade-off.  Also, I added Vitamin E and (2 drops of) lemongrass essential oils to the gel last time – the scent was too strong. This time I chose to leave the gel unscented. Actually, the marshmallow root gave it a pleasant, mildly herbal scent. I wear perfume oils daily and I think leaving my hair and body products unscented is a better choice. Finally, I used the last batch of gel on loose hair and wasn’t really impressed. Sure, it slicked back my hair for a smooth ponytail, but couldn’t water do that just as easily? It didn’t flake in my hair, but it did flake when it touched my skin (nape of neck, ears – basically anywhere that it spilled & I missed cleaning it up). I’ll use this batch of gel on some small to medium two-strand twists tomorrow to see what it can do. I don’t expect it to give me any serious hold, but I do expect it to keep my twists a bit more frizz free than usual.

Lavender Rose Tea

Lavender Rose Tea:
1 Cup Water
1t Lavender
1/2 t pink rose buds

Boil water and add to herbs as making tea. Let steep for 30 minutes. Strain into container of choice for a refreshing spritz or hair rinse. Refrigerate when not in use.

Thoughts: I debated adding glycerine to this mix, but I’m still not sure if I will. I’ll use this tea as a body and hair spritz while I’m on vacation. It’s just scented water for all I care, so I’m not expecting it to do anything besides add moisture like water does.

Do you make your own hair or body products? Have any good recipes or suggestions to share? I’d love to hear about it.

Why am I always stuck in this perpetual loop of thinking and inaction? Perhaps it is a fear of failure and/or a fear that I’ll regret my choices later on. I often get so crippled with fear of doing something wrong that I just simply do nothing. I mean, you can’t make a mistake if you do nothing, right? WRONG! The first mistake here is that line of reasoning. The next mistake is staying still. If I don’t act then I have failed because I didn’t give myself a chance to succeed.

I said in a previous post how I wanted more. Well, I won’t have more of whatever I desire if I don’t stop this cycle of analysis. I must pick a choice and act upon it. If a mistake is made I won’t know until after the act is done and I’ll have to deal with that when it comes…

Alternatively, I’ve thought about taking the ultimate leap by living and working wherever fate may take me for 2 years. I have started and abandoned my Peace Corps application more times than I care to admit. For whatever reason, I just couldn’t bring myself to write and submit my essays. I suppose I wasn’t ready. Am I ready now? Stay tuned…

St. Vincent – Vincy carnival?
India – Saris, Taj Mahal, chaos. Yes!
Dubai – Skiing in the dessert?
Ghana – Slave trade history
Brazil – Vibrancy!
Barbados – Liming and running
Turkey – shopping & belly dancing
Costa Rica – ziplining through jungles
Trinidad – Carnival, anyone?
Jamaica – authentic jerk & sunshine
Thailand – floating market
Mozambique – I just must
South Africa – for the accents & history
Cape Verde – beautiful people
Bali, Indonesia – Gorgeousness!
Philippines – beaches on a budget
Côte D’Ivoire – once it’s safer
Senegal – to learn Wolof
Italy – gelato, pasta, fashion, amore

I’d also like to re-visit some places I’ve visited in childhood and early adulthood. Is it as lovely as I remembered? Spain, Portugal, France, Greece, and Guadalajara, Mexico.

@singlema returned from Italy last year glowing about her trip with Gate1 Travel. They have quite a few affordable options for many of the places on my list. Perhaps I’ll give them a try. If you have any agency or other travel-related recommendations to share, I’m all ears.

Photo: Freedom by Zenos Frudakis

Somehow I’ve managed to lose myself. I’m so far from the me I thought I would be by now. I’ve listened to the advice of others who probably meant well, but I finally realize that it has been to my detriment. I love what I’m doing, but lately I’ve had this nagging feeling of wanting… MORE! More love. More smiles. More laughter. More adventures. More challenges. More peace. More joy!

Somehow I’ve managed to lose myself. I scrapped my dreams because of other people’s hang-ups. I’ve become cowardly and complacent. I’ve let my fears (and the fears of others) keep me from taking risks that I know I need to take. I’ve cemented my feet when I know should be running. What am I waiting for? The time is now!

Somehow I’ve managed to lose myself. I’ve dwelled on mistakes made for far too long. It’s time to make amends with myself. To forgive myself for my past transgressions and try my very best not to make the same errors again.

Today I got a quick glimpse of the me that is to come. I saw her and she was haaaa-ppyyyyy. I saw her and she was surrounded by children. I saw her wrapped up in vivid colors and a gracious smile. I heard her and she spoke kind words.

Somehow I managed to lose myself, but today I found her in the land of MORE! I’m making my way to her as fast as I can.

I went to bed around 10:30 only to be shaken out of my sleep by gunshots, cars honking, screaming, and fireworks at midnight. At least I guess it was midnight.

Ran into a college friend a few weeks back and we agreed to be gym buddies. She wants to start this week. Guess that puts me in the category of a resolutioner, huh? *Shrug*

This house will be full of people in a few hours and I don’t feel like being social. This should be interesting.

Heard the weather was gorgeous in NYC this weekend. I wouldn’t know. Spent most of it in PJs in bed. I showered and put on a fresh pair of PJs then climbed right back into bed.

There is nothing worse, in my opinion, than a parent who neglects and/or abuses their child. I pray that, when the time comes, I’ll be a great mother to my kiddies. (disclaimer: I’m not preggers)

I finally put on my big girl panties and sent out an apology that was long overdue. It’s time I 1) let things go, 2) forgive myself for my past mistakes, and 3) try my very best not to make that mistake again.

Those are my early NewYear’s morning random reflections. Hope you all are well.

This is the very same man who used to push me into bushes when I saw him on the path, or pinched my arms until they lost circulation EVERY TIME he saw me 10 years ago. The latter still happens to this day, but it’s less severe. His rationale? I was one of those kids who needed to be hemmed up or checked every so often. Truth and tabernacle! I’m glad he did it, but I’m an adult now – Can we stop with the arm pinching? Some habits die hard, huh?

Imagine my ceremony with this man officiating? I’d never make it to I Do. He’d be up there telling all of my business and cracking jokes in his casual, matter-of-fact tone. “Now friends… I don’t know how she convinced him to pull this off… (insert story about crazy 14-year-old me)… but I’m glad we’re here.” Although, now that the seed has been planted, I’m thinking this may not be such a bad idea.

There are 2 other folks I’ve considered for officiants. My “other Dad” from boarding school who was and still is the school’s minister, and my “stand-in Dad” from NYC who is also a minister and one of my late stepDad’s best friends. The first would add an air of sophistication, down-home comfort, and nostalgia with his booming voice and stories. The second? I think he’d have me in tears throughout the ceremony because he’s sure to tell a story or two about my stepDad and I’d lose it, but he too would have jokes. Either way, I’ve got some great options.

But I’m getting waaaaay ahead of myself here as no questions have been asked or answered, no ring has been exchanged, and no agreements have been made between families just yet. It is nice to think about, though. So that’s what I’ll do. Which, funny enough, is EXACTLY what the volunteer officiant told Mr and I to do last night during dinner.

I’m so happy I could shimmy… Who am I kidding? I did shimmy after I weighed in this morning.

I tracked pretty well last week so hooray for progress! Now to keep that up and add in a few more workouts this week. There’s a holiday party and happy hour I’m attending on Tuesday that will surely test my skills. Yummy baked goods, fried pork with mystery dipping sauce, and tasty mixed drinks? I’m looking forward to the challenge. Small portions, a 2 drink maximum, and plenty of dancing will be crucial to my success.

Until then… I’ll continue celebrating my slow and steady slenderization (hooray for made up words) with a Wii Zumba workout. Ciao!

“God bless you, dear.”

I was told these words several times tonight. And every time it was said I thought, He already has.

I don’t talk in depth about religion/faith/spirituality too much on here and I won’t start now. My walk is my own crooked, sometimes stop and go walk and your walk is your own. But I do find it necessary to scrape the surface of this topic from time to time, so follow me for just a moment if you will.

No matter what religion or spiritual path you follow, I believe that they all have some basic things in common – faith, hope, charity, and love. I’ll focus on charity for now. Charity doesn’t have to be some grandiose thing. It can be a simple act of kindness: holding the door open for someone else, making room for another person to fit in the elevator, including someone in your positive thoughts or prayers, or smiling at someone as you pass to acknowledge their presence. It can also be as extravagant as you’d like: giving a kidney to someone, or donating millions to build a community center. So long as it involves being kind to another person, I think it’s charity. To that end, it’s very easy to do.

Blessings? Favor? I’ve got mine and a bit more to spare. Why wouldn’t I share? I think this is a part of my walk. Personally, my charitable acts aren’t done in order to be praised by others or blessed by the most high. They are done as acts of praise BECAUSE I am blessed!

I’m now tracking most of what I eat and doing at least 3 workouts in a week. I’m not perfect so I’ll admit to completely losing my mind with a pan of chocolate fudge brownies last week. I felt like crap later that day and my workout was excruciating. Lesson learned.

It’s keeping it simple and back to basics over here. Just me, eating less and tracking more with the myfitnesspal app, moving more with the Wii Zumba Fitness 2 game, and 4lbs lost from my fluffy frame. Winning!

I’ll admit I had some fears and several questions going into this. Eventually, I found my way and figured out some answers that satisfied me so that I could finish what I started.

Q: What if I can’t afford to give them everything on their list?

A: I found that by using coupons, Groupons, gift cards, and holiday deals, the money I allotted for gifts was able to stretch far more than I could have ever imagined. It was as though once I set the wheels in motion by buying the first gift, the savings kept coming to allow for many more gifts to be purchased. Trust me when I say this was one of my most financially savvy holiday seasons to date. Service and savings? Winning!

Q: What if I can’t find an item on their list?

A: The Mom created a list based on items she found online a few days before Thanksgiving. I went shopping in earnest on Black Friday and found that many of the items were no longer available online or in brick and mortar stores. So, I did my best to substitute for those items in a way that I deemed to be suitable. For example, I searched online and a good 5 stores in vain for these Gap boots for the darling daughter of the family.

Instead of providing the child with no boots, I decided to search for a pair of that was similar in style (black & tall) and quality (genuine leather). What I actually found and purchased, in my humble opinion, were much more sturdy and stylish.

Q: What if they don’t like their gifts?

A: Who doesn’t like gifts? Especially gifts that you received off of your personally written wish list? In the case of the substitution items, I did my best. But I will provide the Mom with all receipts and order forms to make darn sure that all items can be easily returned or exchanged without hassle. It certainly won’t hurt my feelings if she returned or exchanged anything for something that she thought was better. I say, good for her! Go nuts! Get what you want!

@Singlema recently wrote a touching post about holiday giving that further encouraged me to continue doing what I’m doing. Honestly, after reading what she wrote all of my trepidations have disappeared and I’m adding a few more items to my to-do list for the family. I also try to remember what @oldgirlladylee often says about intentions.

Are my intentions good in this endeavor? Yep! I have just about every single thing I need and want, so why not help someone else have some of the same?

Am I doing this so folks will praise me for my acts? Nope. I’m good with what I’m doing for others so far and I can’t wait to do more. I also hope many of you will do some type of good deed for someone else soon, for that is Non Sibi at its finest!

This is the last full week of classes of the semester. I am just ready for this time to be over. I’m done giving lectures, but there’s going to be a mad dash to the finish when it comes to grading in a few weeks. Ah, the life of a professor – so taxing… NOT! Is it winter break yet?

I need to pick up another job. Do you understand how much it pains me to think of that? I enjoy what I do. I also enjoy the flexibility I have in my schedule – not to mention the fact that I don’t have to go to work 5 days a week. Unfortunately, I’ve put on my big girl draws and come to the realization that if I want to be a jet setter, charitable force, and property owner in the next 5 – 7 years, I’m going to have to bring in some more money. Did I mention that I have every intention of retiring early? Yea. Hopefully this process won’t be too difficult.

I’m addicted to hot chocolate. It doesn’t even have to be good hot chocolate. I’m talking about your regular run of the mill Swiss Miss milk chocolate with marshmallows here. I try to have a cup most nights to soothe my sweet tooth and chocolate cravings. It’s not the best solution, but it keeps me sane, and the damage isn’t too horrible at 100 calories a serving.

What else is going on with you?

Kid to parents: What’s that really big monkey that goes around town and tried to steal the little girl?

Dad: Big monkey? King Kong? [chuckles] I thought you meant Obama.

Really, sir? Is this what we’re teaching our kids? Am I wrong for hoping this dude trips and falls or gets hit over the head with my suitcase.

Let’s talk about somewhat happier things…

I went Black Friday shopping twice. The first time I went to Wally’s. My cousin and I arrived at 10:08 for that 10:00pm sale. Talk about madness?!

Me to CSA: Excuse me. Do you know where the… [crazy shoppers distracted me]. Wow! These people are acting like…

CSA: SAVAGES?!

That pretty much sums it up. My intention was to get 2 pair of sheets and an easy bake oven. I went in there totally prepared for madness. I think, however, I underestimated just how mad these Carolina people could be. Exhibit A:

Cousin and I promptly left sans sheets, but avec the oven and all of our limbs within an hour. We thought about heading back into the madness to visit Tarjay & Old Navy, but quickly changed our minds.

The next day I met up with my YouTube buddy Amy (smiles2daytears2morrow) to hit up the last 2 stores. The line at Old Navy was ridiculous! It wrapped to the back of the store. We prepared ourselves for a 45 minute wait and started catching up. About 5 minutes later we heard an angel’s voice ask, “Is anyone paying with a credit card?” I quickly decided that would be me and mentally stuck my tongue out at all the suckas we bypassed in line. I know all those people were not paying with cash, but I guess they didn’t think of using their debit cards as credit cards. #shruglife

Our final stop was Tarjay and I was very worried since the parking lot was packed. Turns out all the techies were next door at Best Buy and taking up the spots at Tarjay. There was no line when we entered and cashiers looked bored as they waited for someone to come to their register. And then it happened. It was like a flash mob of shoppers. They scattered from the aisles as soon as we were ready to check out. The previously nonexistent line soon became a line from hell. So, we did what any sane person would do… We kept shopping and paid for our items in the electronics department. Haha!

I truly hope you’ve had a wonderful Thanksgiving holiday. I know I did.

I truly despise washing dishes by hand. Living on my own with a dishwasher for the last 7 years has spoiled me. Now that I’m back home I’m no good. It’s been 6 months since I’ve lived without a dishwasher. Once the roof is fixed and plumbing is done… Oh and the electricity needs to be re-wired. Yea, I’ll be sure to add dishwasher to the list. Sigh.

I’m really ready for the people under the stairs to move. They moved stuff, left for 2 blissful weeks, and now they’re back getting on my last nerve again. No real moving day in sight and no rent paid for the last 3 months. This is why I won’t be renting my house out to family.

I wanted to purchase a duplex or apartment building in 10 years, but after learning that NY state gives tenants at least 6 months rent free before they can be evicted I’m re-considering. Think I may open up a liquor store or laundromat instead.

I need a good book to read. Any suggestions?

I complain quite a bit, but I’m so very grateful for what I’ve been given. I don’t have as much as some others, but I definitely have enough to meet my needs. I think about those who do not have enough quite often. This year, I’m going to do more than just think. This holiday season I’m adopting a family.

I’m still waiting on my organization of choice in NYC to let me know if this would be possible with one of their families. In the meantime, I’m getting my ducks in a row. On my list so far are:

• gift card so Mom can shop for some of her children’s gifts
• wrapping paper
• voucher for a family outing (ice skating, bowling, movies)

Since I don’t know exactly what the family needs, wants, or prefers yet, I’ll have to wait on getting more personalized items. I’m hoping that I hear back from the organization soon. I’ll give it another week and then I’ll activate Plan B – adopting a family from my favorite community center in Lafayette, IN. I’m so giddy, you’d think I was the one getting the gifts.

Are you doing any charitable giving for the holidays?

I will not be hiring my former personal trainer again. Besides the astronomical fee, I just don’t like working out on someone else’s time. Now that I have typed that out, it all looks like excuses to me. Damn!

I was watching a YouTube video by Antishay last week and it has stuck with me. There is no try and there is no fail, she said. What happened yesterday/in the past doesn’t matter and tomorrow/the future doesn’t exist yet. So, all we have is now…and now….and now. What can I do now to be healthy? What choice can I make now to live a better life? A series of Now’s. I love it!

Here’s my commitment now: I choose to workout today.

What do you choose to do now?

I watched as she left the other competitors in over 1 minute of her dust. I watched as her pace slowed and her stride changed. I cheered her on as Firehiwot Dado and Buzu Deba began to chip away at her lead. I willed her to push through the pain to take off and fight back. My heart broke when they caught up to her. I cried when they passed her and left her in 3rd place. I wanted her to win so badly just because she had the audacity to go out there and give it all she had from the very beginning. I’m sure no one wants to come in 3rd – especially after running 23 miles in 1st place- but her performance was absolutely nothing short of admirable to me.

All three women ran a full marathon in less time than it took me to trot out a half marathon. In fact, they could have finished their 26.2, taken showers, and had an appetizer before I would have finished 13.1. Wow! I was so impressed, so inspired, and so proud just watching them tackle ING NYC today. For a brief moment I thought, “I could do that.” That being complete a full marathon – not finish it in 2:23:15. I have a very long way to go before I am anywhere near ready for 26.2 miles, but it is a goal.

You may not have won the title, Mary Keitany, but I applaud you for running your own race from the very start. Keep your head held high because you have accomplished something great. You, Buzu, and Firehiwot have made me look forward to running again. If I could look half as graceful when I run my next race as you women did today, I would be happy. Thank you for bringing out my inner runner.

I spend quite a few of my weekends in Long Island because my niece and nephew love having me around. It probably has something to do with the fact that I take them wherever they want, cheer really loud at their sporting events, and let them spend my money – within reason. I’m the cool Auntie. I have a reputation to uphold, after all.

A few weeks ago I went to the Oyster Bay Festival in Oyster Bay, NY. Besides oysters and standard street fair food there were also fresh lobsters that could run you up to $30 a plate. What really impressed me, however, was a pretzel stand that had a mustard bar.

Mmm! Mustard

All the mustard your little heart could ever want to try was there. I love mustard, so this was right up my alley. While I wasn’t gorging myself on 10 different types of mustard, I was watching in amazement as my niece did some jump rope tricks.  She’s part of a jumping team that is supposed to be pretty good. Now that I’m back home I’ll finally be able to catch one of her competitions.We ended the night by hitting up our favorite ice cream truck for one of these.

Mr. Softee

Divine!

This past weekend was again spent with the kiddies. I woke up early (to me) on Saturday morning to watch my nephew’s football game. The forecast said snow and I was not looking forward to it, but I put that aside because the nephew sent me a text and asked me to be there. So, like the whipped Auntie that I am, I stood outside in this

No, that’s not snow. Those are large droplets of freezing cold rain which, because it was FREEZING COLD, eventually turned into snow. The whole family was there to witness the boys lose the game in the final 20 seconds. Fun times. Afterward, the Dude and I went to my favorite land of baked goods and hot soup.

That creamy tomato soup is the TRUTH!

After warming up considerably, we braved icy roads to make it to a gathering in honor of my boarding school friend’s birthday at the Brooklyn Brewery.

Cheers!

What a cool place! Think relaxed, dive bar atmosphere with cleaner floors, bathrooms, and adequate lighting… SO, maybe not a dive bar after all. It’s open to the public on the weekends, seating is very much picnic table style, and you can have food delivered to you from the neighborhood restaurants. If delivery’s not your style, there’s a pizza truck outside for your eating pleasure. We played cards, engaged in merriment, and watched as a freshly married couple strolled in to celebrate with their bridal party. I’ll definitely be back.

To the bride and groom!

With all that niece and nephew love, I spend most of my Sundays trying to get my sleep on. Many times I fail, but I think Ms. Molly here has it down to a science.

The Queen of Laziness

That’s all I’ve got today. What do you do with your weekends?

Keep watching to see what else is in store.

If you’re not up on your Latin, Non Sibi means not for oneself. It’s something that’s been drilled into my heart since boarding school. It’s the reason why I love volunteering my time to community organizations. That being said, I’ve been slacking on my service since relocating to NYC. This will be changed ASAPtually.

Until I find an organization at which I can call my service home, I’ll be doing a series of good deeds for various organizations throughout the city. My first deed will be for a domestic violence shelter.

The director said that a mother came in with 6 (of her 9) kids last week. That’s it! All they had were the clothes on their backs and the breakfast they might have eaten that morning… It was after 7pm! The director managed to scrape together some food to feed the family, but said this wouldn’t be so difficult if they still had the discretionary funds they had previously. This is where a sinking economy is taking its toll.

I struggle with eating too much. At this organization, they constantly see families that struggle with not getting enough to eat after they escape their abusive situations. I’ve decided to donate items so they can make some emergency meal kits which may contain:

• Tuna lunch kits
• Instant oatmeal packets
• Hot chocolate
• Soup bowls
• Chef boyardee bowls
• Applesauce
• Fruit cups
• Juice boxes
• Pediasure?
• granola bars
• peanut butter cups
• cereal & shelf stable milk

Can you think of anything else I should include? The items must have a reasonable shelf life, be easily opened without tools, and microwaveable. Bonus points for suggestions that don’t include overly processed foods (the shelf life thing makes this challenging), and are good sources of protein.

I’ll be watching the sales papers and collecting coupons over the next 2 weeks to make my purchases. If you would like to help by donating items, coupons, time to assemble the kits, or suggestions of where I can get the best deals on these items locally, feel free to email me at: aunaptural1[at]gmail[dot]com.

I’ll post progress updates about this project over the next few weeks, so stay tuned.

Photo Credit: http://webdevelop2.com

I teach an undergraduate course called Cognitive Development and we discuss all types of fun (to me) things like sociocultural influences to cognition, learning to think with symbols, and language development in children. I love teaching! What I do not love, however, is when my students don’t seem to give two flying figs about what it is I’m saying. Yea, I get it. No one, and I mean no one, wants to sit and be lectured to for 1 hour and 15 minutes (or 2 hours and 40 minutes for one of my classes). I was a student not so long ago, so I understand this and try to be refrain from babbling for long stretches of time. This, I think, helps with student engagement. Some other things I’ve tried to do to develop and maintain engagement are:

1. Get their attention! …over and over and over again

I generally do this by playing som upbeat music before the lecture begins. This serves 2 purposes – it wakes up any sleepyheads, and gives them a cue that, when the song is over, it’s time to focus. I also try to start each lecture by expressing my enthusiasm for the day’s topic. There are days when I don’t feel well, or days when I really don’t care for the particular topic, but I give my best effort to get them excited to learn. This may be trivial to many of you, but I find it sets the tone for each class. Also, I was once told in a professional development seminar that most students have an attention span of 10 -15 minutes in class. I immediately wondered, what do I do with the remaining 60 – 65 minutes then? While I’m not sure how accurate this is, I do understand the concept. I have a limited amount of time to grasp and keep their attention before their minds wander off to somewhere else. I try to make the most out of those 15 minutes by leading with the important details of whatever I’m discussing. I’m also sure to add in very robust images to support and explain anything we’re discussing. This maintains attention (and re-captures attention if it has wandered). I do this over and over and over again for every. single. concept.

2. Ask questions

Throughout the lecture, I frequently pause and ask questions that require students to synthesize/reflect upon a concept I just described, apply what they just learned to the real world, and share an example of this application with the class. For instance, let’s say I just taught them that the “zone of proximal development (ZPD)” is what Vygotsky defines as the difference between what a child can do without help and what they can do with help, and “scaffolding” is the help that you receive from someone else to complete the task. I might ask students to break into discussion groups and think of something they can currently do that they previously could not do alone. I also ask: How did you learn how to do it? Did you face any challenges while learning?

A common example my students have given is learning to drive. This simple group discussion works well because it brings out hilarious stories of blundering in driver’s ed school or being frustrated with learning from a parent. More importantly, this process reinforces the key terms of Vygotsky’s theory, and personalizes the terms so they’re more than just something they learned in a stuffy textbook. Rather, Vgotsky’s theory is now something that can be seen at work in the real world. This process works swimmingly because it models a method for students to formulate questions on their own about the material as they read.

3. Test them

While most of my students moan and groan about the weekly quizzes I give them, they have slowly come to understand and appreciate the importance of them. I don’t give quizzes because I enjoy them. I’d rather not have to enter 100+ grades every single week. I do, however, give quizzes to keep students sharp. If you know you’re going to be asked to prove what you know (and you care about doing well on this task), you’re more likely to ensure that you know the material before you sit down with that paper and pencil. Recently, I’ve also added an extra component in my classes. Since most people like give-aways and game shows, I ask questions a la Who Wants To Be A Millionaire (sound effects and all) sporadically throughout the lecture. Whoever gets the correct answer first gets a prize (usually promotional items from the college or a health fair like a highlighter, pen, or hand sanitizer). So far, it’s working. Even the students who rarely raise their hands are starting to come out of their shells and attempt to get involved and answer questions. Who says college lectures can’t be fun?

4. Foster a positive learning environment

I have a student who asks at least 5 questions per lecture. At least 3 of her questions require me to repeat something I literally just said before she raised her hand. Yes, it’s annoying as hell. No, I do not let her know this. Instead of telling her that she would do better to listen more carefully, I re-phrase what I just said slowly. Though some of her classmates are visibly annoyed when she raises her hand,  I see many of them writing down my re-phrased answers in response to her. By answering this student’s incessant questioning, it lets others know that the classroom is a safe space. If you don’t understand something, ask! If you missed what I said, ask me to repeat it! If I mix up my terms (I am human), let me know so I can clarify it. Eliminating the fear of  looking silly in front of your peers, I find, fosters a more engaging learning environment.

Those are but some of the tactics I use in my classes. Yea, many of them may seem childish and a bit gimmick-y, but it works (99%) of the time for me. We are all educators at some point in our lives. Parents and older family members educate the children in their lives, you may educate a less-informed peer on your particular level of expertise, and teachers educate students (mostly) within a classroom. What methods do you use to foster a positive learning environment? Do you struggle with student engagement? Let’s chat!

Many of you follow me here and on twitter already, but did you know that I’m also on YouTube? I’ve decided to integrate my online persona by incorporating a new channel with video updates.

In true Random Thoughts fashion, I’ll be posting blogs and vlogs about whatever comes to mind. On deck are a few new series:

• Professor Aunaptural – this is where I’ll be discussing challenges as a newly minted professor. This week’s topic: Student Engagement
• Me, My Naps, and I – here, I’ll discuss all things hair related. Upcoming topic: Shrinkage
• I’ll also have a (currently unnamed) series that chronicles my journey to a healthier lifestyle. It’s time I really make myself more accountable for my health.

I’m really looking forward to blogging and vlogging more often. I’ve so many random thoughts, and, frankly, I think the people in my life are tired of me talking their heads off.

Watch me on YouTube at Aunaptural1
Tweet me at @aunaptural
And keep reading me here at Random Thoughts.

My Mom, Sister-in-law, and Boo cheered me on throughout the race. They were in the perfect spots because it seemed like whenever I was losing steam, there they were telling me I could do it. My 6-year-old little cousin, who rubbed my bib number last night for good luck, helped make the best sign ever. This is the most family I’ve ever had at a race and I’m so very glad they were there.

I also had a bomb playlist on the old iPod that warmed me up for a mile, then revved me up around mile 4, renewed my spirits around mile 8, and carried me almost to mile 12… Just before it froze. Lol! I did that last 1.1 miles with nothing but the sound of my breathing and footsteps to keep me from losing my mind. Talk about a major desire to finish strong! My legs felt the best they’ve ever felt at mile 12 and I was able to jog most of the last mile before I made a mad dash to the finish. This may have been one of my slowest races to date, but I’m so proud of me it’s not even funny. I did this race just to prove to myself that I could -extra weight be damned! I earned my feather boa, tiara, red roses, blinged out medal, and every last drop in that glass of champagne I was given at the finish line.

What a fun race! I’ll post pictures as I get them.

Earlier in the summer I was dancing to maintain a more active lifestyle. The workouts were great and fun… until they weren’t anymore. Moving right along. LOL! Once the teaching gig began I made a choice. Instead of sitting around my office for 3 hours between classes, I started going to the gym. I did this on my own for the first 2 weeks. To up the ante, I also hired a personal trainer for 4 weeks. I have one week left of training and have used it as a great foundation to maximize my workouts. Since I’ve basically established and maintained an exercise routine for over a month, I can now focus more of my attention on the nutrition aspect of health and fitness. I know most people do this simultaneously, but that’s overwhelming for me. *shrug* Learning from my past mistakes, having more time on my hand, and enjoying a minimally stressful lifestyle means that I’m better able to tackle this.

Yea, I’m sore as hell most days of the week. Yea, I completely suck at pushups. Yea, I sweat like a man and get winded pretty quickly during training sessions. BUT! I have more energy (assuming I go to bed at a decent time), I’m happier, and I have several opportunities to impress the hell out of myself during the week. What? You don’t want to go to the gym today? Too bad. Get your ass up and go anyway! Huh? You don’t think you have anything else left in you? That’s OK. Just try one more. See? That was easy. Now try another. <—By the time I’m done with that I’ve finished a set of 10 or 15. This is how success happens for me. Sheer will, determination, defiance, and stubbornness. It ain’t easy. It definitely won’t be anything I see changing overnight, but it feels damn good!

I’m in a good place right now. I have ups and downs, but they aren’t as extreme as they were previously. For this, I am so grateful. So, yea. I look in the mirror and see the short, fat chick staring back at me. I look her dead in the eyes and tell her, “Don’t get comfortable! You’ll be leaving soon.”

When I first moved back to NYC in May I didn’t have a job. Although I was hired in June, I didn’t get my first paycheck until the end of September. Let’s have that sink in for a second. That’s 4 months of no income. Since I was living off of my savings and had lots of time on my hands, I decided to cut even more corners than usual by using coupons. I know this isn’t anything new – but it’s new for me. You see, I thought I had it down without coupons. I only bought things when they were on sale, and I rarely purchased name brand items because store brands are generally cheaper. I’m a generic girl. I figured, what good would coupons do me? Obviously, I had a lot to learn. Recently, I’ve been educated on savvy couponing and I’ve been putting it to good use. Apparently, name brands are cheaper than store brands… if you use your coupons properly.

You won’t see me on Extre.me Coupon.ing or anything like that, but I’ve noticed that in my tiny little neighborhood in Brooklyn I get funny looks as I pull out my stash for a transaction. Maybe I’m self-conscious or paranoid. I get over it very quickly, though. I try not to go to stores during peak times, and I carefully choose the most efficient cashier who looks like she/he doesn’t completely hate their job. Trust me on this last one. With a neighborhood of neck rolling sistagirls, finding someone who is pleasant and efficient on the register makes all the difference.

The last thing I’ve learned is how to make couponing work for my lifestyle. With the new gig, I’ve really realized how much my time is worth. That being said, I will not spend tons of time couponing like many of the extremers do. Instead, I take shortcuts and let other people do the work for me. I use websites that have lists of available coupons and match them to my local stores’ weekly sales. Instead of buying several Sunday papers and clipping several sets of coupons, I’ve now opted to utilize a coupon clipping service. Who knew such a thing existed? Basically, you go online, search for the specific coupons you want/need, and pay for them to be shipped to you all nicely clipped and neat. Typically, the coupons cost between $.10 – $.40 (for big discount coupons). Shipping is about $.44 and I spend a little over $5 total – the cost of 4 Sunday newspapers- for 30+ coupons. I find this a better use of my time, money, and energy. It allows me to bypass the hassle of purchasing and scouring several newspapers for specific coupons and guarantees that I’ll have the ones I want in my possession. More importantly, I’m free to frolick and focus on other things. This works for me, but may not work for you.

In my family, I’m known for being the money savvy one. My Mom used to call me cheap. Once she realized my “cheap-ness” allowed me to purchase, pay for, and maintain a new SUV, as well as pay rent and utilities for the past 7 years without any assistance from her, her attitude and name-calling changed really quickly. Cheap soon became frugal. When I began using coupons, she shook her head. “There she goes again”, she thought. My boyfriend even made fun of me the first time he saw me sorting the clippings. Whatever! I shrugged it off and paid them no attention. Once Mom went to the store with me and saw savings of at least 50% on our purchases, she had nothing else negative to say. When the boyfriend realized I could upgrade his razors for half the price of the crappy ones he was previously using, he began singing another tune as well. Now I’m the designated shopper for the household. I still have a lot to learn, but my ultimate goal is to have transactions with over 80% savings. A 90% savings would be great. Tiny steps.

What do you do to save money? Do you use coupons or any other tactics to get more bang for your buck?

I just paid more than I wanted for a race, BUT I think know it will be worth the money. What am I going on about now? The Diva Half Marathon, of course. The race is on Sunday, October 2nd in Long Island. This is great for me because: 1) I need a training goal for October, and 2) this race is pretty close to home. Actually, I may spend the night before the race at my brother’s house in Long Island since he lives about 10 minutes away from the start line. I’m really nervous and excited all at once. I found an 8 week training schedule that looks manageable and will start this week.

This week also marks the beginning of my End-of-Summer vacations to Hawaii and St. Martin. From August 10th through August 27th I’ll have to figure out how to stick to my training schedule (and not pig out as I’ve been prone to do) while travelling. I’m packing my sneakers, workout clothes, iPod armband, and fuel belt for both trips. I WILL be wogging on somebody’s beach. I guess I’m really excited about this race because it’s the first time my family will be able to cheer me on for a half. The first time I did the Indy Mini my Mom volunteered and handed out gatorade at mile 3. I spent the next 10.1 miles looking at all the awesome signs other people’s family members were holding up to encourage them. I want a sign this year, dammit! I sure hope my niece and nephew will make one for me. My goals for the Diva LI are: 1) to finish injury free before the cutoff of 3hrs 30mins, 2) to set a PR, and 3) enjoy every bit of the race.

I’m also dancing again. I started practicing with a company last week and it’s lots of fun, but boy is it challenging. I find myself for the first time in a long time learning something new and loving the things my body can do. Of course I wouldn’t be me if I wasn’t a wee bit hard on myself. I make more mistakes than I’d like and it annoys me. I constantly have to remind myself that, despite how fabulous I may be, I can’t possibly know how to do every single thing. I will have to pay attention, practice, mess up, take corrections and criticism gracefully, and try again until I get it right. The perfectionist in me has had to give way to the imperfect student over and over and over again. Funny how something so simple can have such a profound impact.

For those of you who prayed for me when I couldn’t even pray for myself, I am ever so grateful. For those of you who encouraged me when I was extremely downtrodden, I thank you. Right now, I’m in a good place. Keep the prayers and encouragement coming and I’ll do the same for you.

Do you have any fitness goals for the Fall?

“Here,” she said, “in this here place, we flesh; flesh that weeps, laughs; flesh that dances on bare feet in grass. Love it. Love it hard. Yonder they do not love your flesh. They despise it… No more do they love the skin on your back. Yonder they flay it. And O my people they do not love your hands. Those they only use, tie, bind, chop off and leave empty. Love your hands! Love them! Raise them up and kiss them. Touch others with them, pat them together, stroke them on your face ‘cause they don’t love that either. You got to love it, you! And no, they ain’t in love with your mouth. Yonder, out there, they will see it broken and break it again.What you say out of it they will not heed…What you put into it to nourish your body they will snatch away and give leavins instead. No they don’t love your mouth. You got to love it.”

“This is flesh I’m talking about here. Flesh that needs to be loved. Feet that need to rest and to dance; backs that need support; shoulders that need arms, strong arms I’m telling you. And oh my people, out yonder, hear me, they do not love your neck unnoosed and straight. So love your neck; put a hand on it, grace it, stroke it, and hold it up. And all your inside parts that they’d just as soon slop for hogs, you got to love them. The dark, dark liver – love it, love it, and the beat and beating heart, love that too. More than eyes or feet… More than your life-holding womb and your live-giving private parts, hear me now, love your heart. For this is the prize.”

-Beloved, Toni Morrison

I first read Beloved in high school and the words spoken by Baby Suggs, an elder woman preacher, have resonated with me ever since. She talks about loving yourself – every inch of yourself. I think this is especially important if you are ever going to love anyone else. But let’s back up. In addition to kissing hands and getting all cozy with our livers I think we need to focus on some mental love. Perhaps the best way to start is with forgiveness and acceptance. Forgive yourself for your mistakes. Accept yourself – flaws and all. I know very well that this is easier said than done, but it’s oh so necessary. Once you love yourself – oh the peace that will come. It won’t matter if others don’t love your flesh, or any other part of you. Love yourself extra hard in spite of what others do.

You maintain self love by continuously reminding yourself that you are worthy of forgiveness, acceptance, and peace. Be patient with yourself. You will mess up. Be kind to yourself. Absolutely no good will come of beating yourself up for anything. Love yourself to the fullest. Love yourself because it gives others a model of how to love you. Love yourself so that you will know how to love others. Pretty simple thoughts, no?

In the end, all that matters is love. Love yourself. Love what you do. Love who you are and who you are becoming. Love your flaws. Love your strengths. Love others.

-Au Naptural

I’ve been thinking quite a bit about love today. As such, I’d like to explore these thoughts a bit more via this here blog for the month of August. I’ll start tomorrow’s post off with my thoughts on self love. Why is it important? How do we achieve it? How can we maintain it? Follow me as I figure it out.

Speaking of vacation… I’m so flipping excited about going to Hawaii and Saint Maarten it’s not even funny. I spent the last four days visiting a high school friend on Martha’s Vineyard and it was divine. There were a few moments where I just sat on the beach and marveled at what God created. If I can find such peace during only four days there, I can only imagine the kind of continued joy I will have with 2 weeks in paradise. I’m looking forward to visiting my family and just acting a fool, too. On my to do list for August is running or walking on the beach at least 3 more times. I think I’ll be satisfied with just that.

I might have the running bug again. Not really sure. I do intervals of jogging and speed walking currently. I’m a little more winded than I would like after only 2 laps around a track, but I know endurance and stamina will take time to (re)develop. In the meantime, I’m on the hunt for a 10K or half marathon in October in the NYC area. Perhaps if I begin training for something my motivation will not wax and wane like it usually does after about 5 weeks. We’ll see.

Not sure if I posted this here, but I got a part-time job. I’ll be an adjunct assistant professor at a local college this fall. Kinda cool. Especially since my savings is taking a major hit due to several unforeseen/last-minute expenses. It will be really nice to replenish it by Christmas. The job doesn’t seem to demanding. I’m just teaching 3 sections of the same course so I have to prep once and be done with it. I’m a bit nervous about being in front of a class as DOCTOR Au Naptural for the first time, but I’m sure this will pass. My biggest concern is that I’m teaching a more advanced undergraduate course on material I haven’t reviewed in years. I WILL pick up the text and read that textbook on Monday. I’d like to have my course all prepped and ready to go on semi-autopilot when I return from vacation.

That’s what’s going on with me. Most of you I follow on Twitter and in blogland, but for those that I don’t… Update me on you. Got any good news to share?

My cousin’s husband, P, is one of my favorite cousins. Why? Because he adores his wife, his 2 young kids, his family, and he’s just the greatest guy I’ve ever met. Such a pure heart and hilarious to boot. If I could clone him I would. I’m so serious! P is also active military and returned from his 2nd deployment a few months ago. Do you know how happy I am that he made it home safely? For all these reasons, and the fact that he married one of my favorite and spunkiest cousins, I couldn’t wait to visit them in Hawaii this summer. OK. Who am I kidding? I wanted to go to Hawaii, but the free lodging and home cooked meals sealed the deal. I originally planned to go in July, but I dragged my feet and missed out on reasonably priced tickets. Given the ridiculous jump in airfare (from $744 to $1025) I decided to postpone the trip until Christmas or early January.

Sadly, I got word a few weeks back that P has stage 4 colon cancer. Last I checked there are no more stages after 4. The docs won’t tell him how much time he has left because they believe God has the final say. I believe that too, but y’all know I am a worrier, right? Yes, God has the final say when we all go, but He doesn’t exactly let us all in on his plans. That being said, I would never forgive myself if P passed away before I could get over there to visit. I have an open invitation to visit whenever I wish and have been mulling over a visit in August. I talked to my Mom and SIL about the situation and they both advised me to go over no matter what the cost since I have the money and time to do it.

I’m the type of person that loves my family extra hard. Yes, even the losers that piss me off. [Enter awkward transition] When my (step)Dad was hospitalized my Mom kept it from me for a few days. I wanted to get on the next flight to see him when she told me. I wanted to let him know that he was loved. To let him know that we were in good hands. To say goodbye. He died the next day and a part of me still regrets not being able to get home sooner. I know that he knew all of the things I wanted to tell him, and that he wasn’t lucid enough to understand anything I would have said anyway, but I wanted just one more good day with him. Since then I’ve tried to visit my family sooner when I hear their health is declining. When my grandfather was hospitalized last year, I hopped in a car with 2 hours notice and drove 700 miles to get home to see him. What I found was a weak, dying man. I said my goodbyes and he passed a few weeks later. I still wish I got to spend more time with him when he was stronger and well enough to know I was in the room. Both of these situations have taught me the utmost importance of giving folks their flowers while they’re still alive.

I guess I wrote all of this to say… I’m going to Hawaii to have a great time with my family – cancer be damned!

After I returned from my workout Mom and I headed to the beach to meet up with my sister(in-law), niece, and nephew. Fun times and gorgeous sights to be seen.

How was your Saturday?

I figured out a way to get some free dance classes – good ol’ bartering! I’ll volunteer my time at the studios in exchange for classes. We’ll see how this works out.

I suppose she got tired of me moping around the house complaining about how my summer clothes don’t fit, but Mom snagged me some bermuda shorts and polo shirts last weekend. Yippee! Small things make all the difference.

My cat is adorable and so very affectionate. Now if we can get her to understand that my laptop and iPad are not devices for her to lay on top of when I’m working on them (or ever, really) we’ll be OK. Regardless, I’m happy that she’s here. My allergies to her have all but disappeared. This makes her pretty happy since she likes to jump into my bed and snuggle next to me.

I began this post with something negative. I decided to delete it and discuss the positive happenings in my life instead. Even I need a break from doom and gloom. What’s new with you?

I like dancing. I enjoy taking classes. I like sweating for a legitimate reason besides it being hot as hell and humid outside. I just don’t know how to motivate myself to do more. Baby steps aren’t working for me. I need a swift kick in the ass. The truth is, since I’m unemployed, I no longer have health insurance. I literally cannot afford to be sick or this unhealthy. I know this. And yet, I continue to sabotage myself in several ways. I’m really not sure I can do this on my own. I need help. I cannot afford help. I do not like admitting that I need help. It makes me feel like a weak ass failure. Some people find the motivation deep within themselves to change. For me, it has gotten to the point where I’m beginning to believe that maybe I’m destined to be a slovenly fat bastard. I enjoy the hell out of food. It’s about the only thing I truly enjoy these days – well, besides the few dance classes I’m taking. Food, though? It’s there for me when I’m bored, when I’m sad, when I’m lonely, when I’m disappointed… When I feel confused, when I feel whatever, food is there to comfort me. I’m soothed. I’m satisfied. Until I attempt to get dressed, or weigh myself, or look in the mirror… I know that food is not my friend. But what else or who else do I have? I feel so alone it’s… I don’t even know how to describe what I’m feeling. Some people find motivation through spiritual means. Me? I’m not there yet.

Daily – actually, it’s more like HOURLY – I go through cycles of guilt, shame, embarrassment, despair, loneliness, anger, and depression. Whatever this is it’s deep. I haven’t been able to shake it yet. I’m fighting some major demons. If I’m truly honest I’ll admit that I’ve given up fighting weeks ago. At this point, life is just happening to me. I wish I knew how to overcome this. I wish I had the discipline and strength to overcome this. I wish I had the support I need to overcome this. I wish for so many things, but mostly I just wish my demon would stop torturing me. I just want some peace.

Miserable people suck! I know. We are all entitled to mope every now and then, but seriously?! Don’t mope too long around me – it makes me sad too. How about getting a blog and venting like the rest of us?

I’ve always loved humidity. It’s great for my skin. It’s great for my hair. Well, that last part was true until I decided to wear it blown out and flat ironed. I love the big fro, but this shrinkage is killing my high.

I called every single member of my brother’s family via cell today and none of those bamas answered. You mean to tell me that none of the four people sitting in the same house realized their phones were all ringing one after another? When he finally called me back I had a major attitude. Answer your damn phone!

If you tell me you’ll be here a little after 12 instead of around 2pm as previously planned, please try to get here on time. I had other things to do and didn’t do them because you said you’d show up within the hour. Hmph!

OK! So I admit my living situation (still not ready to divulge all of it just yet) and that ticket this morning – but mostly the former – has me in a foul mood. I’ve shut myself off from others so as not to infect them with my misery. I’ll have a glass of wine, calm my nerves, put on a happy face, and go on about my business.

Enjoy the rest of your holiday weekend, folks.

1. I’m not perfect and I don’t need to be.
2. Trying and falling short is much better than not trying at all.
3. Red meat and I are not the best of friends.
4. Dancing makes me happy.
5. Be flexible, and take advantage of any opportunities to improve that may come your way.

I’ve been trying very hard lately to apply my judgments to my own life. I don’t curse at kids. EVER! But listening to all of the foul mouths around me has helped curb my potty mouth. Seeing several women who are graceful, in shape, active, and have a general air of flyness about them inspires me to step my game up in all of those departments. Being accosted by old men in the street has taught me to hold my man’s hand the next time I’m eating an ice cream cone in public so that mess won’t happen again… or to only eat ice cream in cups. All jokes aside, that situation taught me to be more gracious and to laugh loudly at life’s little moments. Being around so many rude people has forced me to check my own attitude on several occasions. Why are you upset? Is it really that deep? I see myself in every single one of those people and I’m grateful for the lessons they’ve unknowingly taught me. I’m grateful for the opportunity to see some of my own bad behavior reflected back to me in others because it forces me to grow, to change, to improve.

On a positive note, I did get some of my nutrition under control. Thanks to a recurring feeling of ick and sluggishness whenever I eat meat, I decided to become a pescatarian for 2 weeks to give my poor tummy a break. I drank more water and ate more fruit and veggies throughout the week. I’ve also never wanted a steak so badly in my life One more week to go and I may try one on the grill. I rounded out the weekend with an African dance class on Sunday. Not sure if it’s due to the change in diet or the change in attitude, but I had much more energy during class this week. Someone actually complimented me on my stamina. Go me!

Week 4 will be better. I’ll walk around the neighborhood, hit the gym with Mommy dearest, continue eating loads of fruit and veg, begin tapering off the carbs, play MJ the Experience, and take a dance class or 2 over the weekend. Still in it.

Last year I achieved one of my biggest and challenging life goals by earning a PhD. There were several instances when I thought I wouldn’t be able to do it. I felt discouraged by the daunting task set before me. Then, one day I decided enough was enough. I was done being scared, timid, and feeling trapped by graduate school. I decided to push my August graduation up to May a little over 5 weeks before the deadline. I wasn’t finished analyzing my data yet, and was still collecting more data just to be safe. With less than 3 weeks to go, I began writing my dissertation. I’m very certain that if I can do that I can do just about anything I set my mind to. While my dissertation isn’t the best thing I’ve ever written, I’m still proud of what it represents. Hard work and dedication. If I can do something that great in less than 3 months, imagine what I’ll be able to do in 1 year. I’m very excited about dancing. I’ll keep you posted on my progress, but cheer me on as I embark on another year and continue on my journey to a happier and healthier me.

Another simple plan for Week 3 is on deck.This week I will:

1. Meet my 12 mile goal by walking at least 3 miles on 3 days and breaking up the remaining mileage on 2 additional days.
2. Do 50 crunches and 20 pushups on 2 days this week.
3. Eat less red meat, poultry, simple carbs, and sweets. I will eat more fruits and veggies, and drink more water each day.
4. Be successful!

Monday I got up and walked on the trails by my house. Forgetting that it takes me 0.3 miles to get to the trail entrance, I still did 3 miles as planned. Woohoo for an extra .6 miles! Tuesday morning I overslept, took the cat to the vet, and high tailed it to work. Do you see any walking in there? Me either. Good thing I put on my pedometer before leaving the house and made it my business to log 3 miles walking around campus, the neighborhood, from the back end of the parking lot to the store when I ran errands… Basically, I had to get it in however I could. I fell short by 0.3 miles but I’m very proud of myself for giving it the good old college try. Next time I’ll give it the grad school try and we’ll be in business. Today is Wednesday and I haven’t logged any miles yet. The storm has passed over the city and I’m pretty excited to get another walk in on the trails around 6pm. I’m determined to make my mileage goals this week. I have to be able to see this thing through!

I don’t know how many times I have to learn and re-learn this lesson. You need a plan, AuNaptural! Stick with the plan as best as you can. Be flexible to reach your goals. If you can’t get in a 3 mile walk all at once, make sure you take small walks and get in 3 miles for the day. If you fall short, don’t beat yourself up. Keep trying until you get there. Funny how I can use the “keep pushing” mantra to earn a PhD, but hadn’t thought to apply this mantra to other aspects of my life until now.

*I’m experimenting with doing very limited edits in my writing in an attempt to just get my words across on the blog. Forgive me if my writing has been all over the place lately.  I’m still working on this. If you’ve followed this to the end… Thanks!

Week 1 Report:

Walking at home with the commute is fine so long as I do it before I begin my day (Day 1) or break it up into small pieces around campus (Day 2).

I was stuck in an airport for 8 hours, so I tried to walk around the world’s smallest terminal for 1K to keep myself sane. When I finally got to my destination, I did a bit more walking that I happened to log. I walked through Reagan airport, lugged a heavy carryon through the metro, and my friends and I walked a mile back to our hotel after dinner. Unfortunately, I didn’t reach my 3mile goal. Fortunately, I did get pretty close at 2.28 miles. I’ll take it. All bets for pushups and situps after that horrendous travel day were off.

Thursday began with good intentions. We had a 2.5 hour break between conference sessions and a dinner reception so I planned to walk around Dupont Circle then. Too bad the conference, that began at 7am, ran late and we didn’t return to our hotel until 5:45pm. Yes, I could have used the 45 minutes I had between being bludgeoned over the head with back to back hour-long sessions and what turned out to be a dinner reception followed by an unnecessarily dull keynote speaker to walk, but your girl was exhausted. Shame on me.

Friday was redemption day. I woke up early, had room service for breakfast, and looked forward to a nice walk around the neighborhood after the conference  activities since we were scheduled to get out at 4pm. And then I got food poisoning after lunch. Intense bouts of cramps, vomiting, and diarrhea lasted from 1pm Friday until Sunday morning.

Saturday was another horrific travel day which was made even more lovely given the state of my intestines. Lethargy was my name for the day.

*Bonus* I did get in 1/2 mile on Sunday afternoon. Walking that far with 1/2 gallon of milk, 1/4 watermelon, and other groceries has to count for something right? No? OK, fine.

While I’m happy to report that I can now eat solid foods and drink something other than ginger ale or water without serious repercussions, I’m very ashamed to write that I didn’t achieve all of my goals for week 1. Apparently, I need to make my goals even simpler for week 2 if I’m going to succeed. Here goes…

Week 2 goal: Walk at least 12 miles

Monday & Tuesday: Walk 3 miles before the commute.

Wednesday & Thursday: 30 minutes on treadmill at community center  or a friend’s apartment near campus

Friday: Walk 3 miles around campus

It feels like I’m selling myself short, but I really need to keep it simple. I’m still in this. Baby steps.

Monday: Walk 3 miles on the Monon followed by 3 sets of 5 pushups (gotta start somewhere) and 50 crunches.

Tuesday: Repeat from Monday.

Wednesday (travel day): Looks like I’m going back to DC for a conference, so this one will be tricky. I will still do the 3 sets of pushups and 50 crunches. If my hotel has an exercise room I will do 30 minutes of sprint intervals on the elliptical.

Thursday & Friday: More sprint intervals on the elliptical followed by crunches and pushups.

This coming week will be a major challenge for me. I’m balancing an insane commute today and tomorrow (60 miles each way) and an intense travel/conference schedule Wednesday through Saturday, but I WILL be successful.

What are you doing for fitness this week?

Since I am officially unemployed I have nothing better to do than… look for employment and dedicate the majority of my day to improving my health. I’ll be re-activating my gym membership when I return to Brooklyn. When I workout on my own I’ll do cardio for 25 minutes and weight lifting for 25 minutes. <— That plan sounded good when I first wrote this post a few weeks back, but now I know better. Going to the gym is only fun when I do group exercise classes. I’m not ready to commit to gym fees until I get back in the habit of making better choices. I’d also like to spend my money taking dance classes and enjoying the femininity and freedom of movement that comes with a dancer’s body. So, my new plan is very simple. I will begin by walking at least 3 miles 3 days a week. I will also follow this with pushups, situps, lunges, and jumping rope. When I return to Brooklyn in 2 weeks, I’ll resume dance classes. Done!

As for diet, I will drink more water, eat more fruit, veggies, and lean meats, and consume less processed sugar and carbs. See? Simple. I will not be able to sustain anything extreme for very long. I will, however, be able to succeed with small and simple changes. However long it takes me to finally feel comfortable in my skin is however long it takes me, but I’d like to see a loss of 3 dress sizes before September. I know this post is all over the place. Please excuse me while I get my writing mojo back.

As of 12pm today:

I am the first person in my family to earn a doctorate

I am also the first African-American to obtain a doctorate in Developmental Psychology at Cornfield U!

I am so excited! The presentation went very well. The “defense” part wasn’t a big deal at all. They want me to make some theoretical changes and spruce up my document a bit more, but that’s to be expected. I’m having a drink or 3 tonight with friends. No worries. I’ll be walking home and will make it to work on time in the morning.

Thank you everyone who has sent a kind word, comment, thought, or prayer my way over the last 6 years. Many of you have read me bitch and moan about this grad school process and now it’s FINALLY coming to an end. I’ve been in school for 24 years and am looking forward to a break. What’s next? I’m taking 6 months off to travel and re-center. I’ll put myself on the job market and finish my Peace Corps application during this time as well. Words can not express how humbled I am by this entire process.

Whew! Time to celebrate!

I know you’re very nervous about this defense, so let’s have a little chat. Everyone says there’s no real need to be scared. Last night, you got some really great advice from 2 sistamentors that have done this before, remember?
“You are the expert.” – Dr. B
“This dissertation is your baby – and they better not call her ugly.” Dr. E

Yea yea yea. You’ve heard it. I know you don’t buy it. There are so many flaws. There are so many things you wish you could have done. What if they ask you something you don’t know the answer to? What if you fail? What if the people you invited see you fail? What if everyone finally realizes that you’ve been flying by the seat of your pants for the last 6 years? Statistical whiz you are not. Theoretical buff you most certainly are not. You’re just a kid. I know chronologically you’re 26, but you’re still that insecure 16 year old who doesn’t know what the he’ll she’s doing. I’m very worried for you. Today you are full of doubts.

But tomorrow you get to make history. Is that not exciting enough for you? You get the privilege of being the first person in your family to get a PhD, and the first, to my knowledge, Black woman (or person really) to get a PhD in your program at your university. Why aren’t you more excited? Oh, I see. You’re afraid of failing.

Well, look here, honey. Cry them tears and practice those slides, look over your data one more time, make some notes, and then dry your eyes and be done with it. At this point, rest assured knowing that you did what you could. It’s time for you to be done with this chapter. I know. You wish you could have done more. You wish you could be as profound and prolific as those folks you read in those fancy journal articles, huh? Stop trying to be them. Stop measuring yourself against someone else. Stop it. You’re gonna mess around and doubt yourself right out of passing. Be confident. Talk slowly. Listen carefully. Be open to criticism and suggestions for improvement.

Read this again after you pass and have a good laugh.

Love,

Me

1) I combed out every single one of my locs. I started a few back rows in February then got overwhelmed with work. I resumed the process last week over my Spring Break. It took me 14 hours a day for 6 days to get it all done. I’m not loving the shrinkage that comes with loose hair, but I am absolutely in love with how soft my hair feels. Bonus points for a lighter head of hair with a faster air-drying time. I replaced every loc with a two strand twist, so I’m rocking that until I feel up to going through a serious detangle. Maybe this weekend.

2) I must confess that I’ve been slacking on my workouts. I’ve not run in almost 3 weeks and I’ve not lifted in almost 2 weeks. Shame! I’m trying to mind what I eat and drink, but those sweets and carbs have been calling me lately. I’m getting back on track in the morning. Despite all of this, I’ve managed to reach my first goal of losing 10lbs (actually it was 9.5lbs but I’m claiming it). I celebrated by buying myself a $10 hair brush My reward for a 20lb loss will likely be a small docking radio/speaker set for my iPod. I think I would like a small 15lb loss reward as well, but I’m drawing a blank for now.

3) I received a scholarship this semester that was 2.5 times more than I originally expected. I used the first installment to pay off my credit card balance. My savings took a major hit, but when the last part of the scholarship money hits my account I should be in decent shape. Related to the scholarship, I also received a grant to fund my dissertation research last semester. They announced a few weeks ago that the grant had been extended, so I’m currently enjoying trying to spend the additional money. If you know how to develop iPad apps, please contact me for possible contract work.

4) Graduation is approaching very quickly. There’s a slim possibility that I’ll actually make the May deadline as originally projected. This means that all paperwork needs to be approved and submitted by April 29th. I’m trying my best to make it happen. If I fall short, then I’ll walk in May and have them mail my degree in August. Silver lining to this is that my scholarship will fund me during the summer, which would really boost my savings account. Either way, I’ll pass my dissertation defense and be Dr. AuNaptural by next month because…

5) I really want to spend the summer relaxing and traveling. On my agenda are trips to New Hampshire, DC, Vegas, St. Maarten, and possibly 2 more from Barbados, Dominican Republic, Costa Rica, Honduras, Hawaii or Thailand.

6) Remind me to finish my Peace Corps application so I can get that ball rolling. I’m trying to be out of the states by December.

That’s what’s new with me. The next post will likely be after my successful dissertation defense. Pray HARD for me to succeed, please.